What is the Grief Process ?
Death is a reality. A reality we cannot escape avoid. It does not matter the person's socioeconomic status, nationality, race, or religious beliefs. Death does not discriminate. It waits patiently for the right moment to enter our lives.
Many individuals believe that the soul continues to live on while the body dies. It is a transition from one form of energy to another. Therefore, when we leave the body and transform into our true being, we are reunited with those we mourned during our stay on Earth.
If dying is not the end but the beginning, why do we cry and pray desperately for a miracle? Why do we question God when a miracle does not manifest? Why do we continue to cling to the dying person and refuse to accept the impending truth that death is near? Why is it so difficult for us to let go of a loved one who is dying?
Isn't death freedom? To be free from the earthly shackles that keep the incarnate spirit confined to the body. So, why do we cry?
Someone shared the following statement concerning the questions mentioned above. "When a loved one departs, we cry for selfish reasons. We cry because we feel abandoned. Many people say, 'What will I do without him?' or 'How will I survive without her?' As you can see, the word 'I' managed to come out. Besides, many of us cry because deep inside, on an unconscious level, we know that our loved ones are free to go home while we remain chained to the various kinds of earthly afflictions. Their earthly mission is over."
When a person clings to a dying person, they is doing more harm than good. The dying person's awareness of their loved one's desperation makes it difficult for the person to die peacefully. According to Sogyal Rinpoche, author of The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, "...you can bring him or her a lot of unnecessary heartaches...the dying person can linger on many months or weeks longer than doctors expected and experience tremendous physical suffering."
Additionally, Sogyal Rinpoche believes that for the dying person to let go and die peacefully, their loved ones should, "...give the person permission to die, and...reassure the person they will be all right after he or she has gone, and that there is no need to worry about them."
All parties need to know that the separation is temporary, and the word farewell is inappropriate. The correct phrase is until we meet again.
When the spirit steps out of the body, it leaves behind flesh and bones. The body is of no importance. The weight of earthly worries, fears, and illnesses no longer exists. The spirit liberates itself from its earthly shell, moving on to a spiritual realm or spiritual home. It is there that the spirit finds healing and reunites with loved ones who departed earlier. It is a time of much celebration and joy.
After a period of regeneration and spiritual healing, the spirit is allowed to come and visit us. Just because we cannot see them as before does not mean that they are not around. They can see and hear us better than before. They have not forgotten us. Their love for us remains steadfast. We are not alone.
When someone dear to you is dying, always remember to let go and give them permission to leave. Tell them that it is okay to journey back home. The separation is temporary, and we will meet again.
The Final Goodbye is NEVER final, for one day we will be reunited..
what is the grief process
The Grief Process Quotes
1. “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” — Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
2. "There are no good-byes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart." – Ghandi
3. "Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped into the next room.
I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by the old familiar name. Speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference in your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household world that it always was. Let it be spoken without effect, without the ghost of shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was. There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.
All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!"
– Henry Scottt Holland
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